The way you two are interacting everyday ,you definitely have something going on. this is no platonic relationship. Whether you acknowledge it or not ,you are “seeing each other”.

The question though is, how is the relationship treating you? Does it bring tears of joy to your eyes ? Or tears of pain and sorrow? Is it alive and giving you the time of your life ,or are there signs that it is headed for the rocks?

Unlike other relationships where you can call it quits or file for divorce, this relationship is for life. So you are going to learn to get along ,or spend the rest of your life together in misery?

I am, of course ,talking about you and money . You may not consider it a relationship, but it is . You spend everyday thinking of money . You touch it . Part with it reluctantly . Like a marriage it takes much to build ,but can so easily crumble. You and money ? Yes . It’s a serious relationship.

COMMITMENT

Without commitment your relationship will buckle ,the fire will burn out, and stand no chance to last the long haul. You need to tell yourself that you are committed to work with your money to achieve all the plans you have ahead of you. Writing these down helps seal this commitment.

Write down your goals and all the things you want to achieve .Spend time reviewing these regularly .That way your decisions to do with money can be more consciously directed

EXCLUSIVITY

Granted ,you and your money will both have other interactions ,but the main focus must be on building YOU. If money goes to rent ,entertainment, upkeep and others ,put a ceiling o that . You are the primary soulmate . There can be no others.

The further down you find yourself and your primary goals in the list of priorities, the more you will feel disgruntled about your relationship with money ,and the harder and longer you will find it to get to your goals . Deliberately place yourself at the top of the list ,by paying yourself first at the very least 40% of your after tax income. this will secure your relationship with money [emergency fund and insurance covers],cater for your sunset years during retirement ,enable you to give and fund the ongoing goals you have.

QUALITY TIME

It’s not how much time you are spending together that will measure the depth of your relationship, rather the amount of quality time. Already a huge chunk of your time with money is on spending which is not what builds your relationship. However, you need to find sufficient opportunity to spend quality time .This time will be spent reviewing how you are tracking with the regular savings you had in your plans which were meant to go towards security ,retirement, giving and other goals.

Take time to track where money has been going daily or at least weekly .there are many suitors out there wanting to woo money away from you whom you need to guard against. Then once a month allocate time to review how well on track, or otherwise you are vis-a’-vis your plans for that month changes you may need to make in your decisions about money for the next month. Every six months take time out to gauge how far your relationship with money has come by examining how your net worth [value of your assets minus debts]compares with the last time you reviewed it .

INVEST IN IT

You only get out of a relationship what you put into it. If consumption is where you mostly take money ,your relationship will ultimately be consumed with nothing to show for it .If on the other hand enough is put into nurturing money ,you grow and will be more assured of returns in days ahead.

Put a restraining order on consumption so that no more than 60% of your money goes to it. That way you are assured that you have a minimum of 40% to invest and that is what will be feeding your relationship in years to come and will enable you to meet your primary goals.

PRACTISE GRATITUDE

A relationship blossoms from continual expression of gratitude. It withers and dies with constant blaming , criticizing and fault finding. Count your blessings and what has gone right and harp on them .You will feel happy with money. Refrain from looking across the fence to envy your neigh bours’ relationship with their money , or even desiring their money. Like they say , the green lawn you are seeing there may just be the result of a burst sewer.

Pat yourself on the back each time you make a positive step forward with money .be graceful for what you have even as you strive for the next level. Practice contentment and stay far from greed for all that you do not have. Greed ruins your relationships with money.

REMAIN FAITHFUL

Cheating will destroy trust within the relationship. When you go beyond the money you have and start to have the plan -on-the-side[live beyond your means] you have begun your descent down the slippery slope of infidelity. Work with money you have and do not be led astray by all those enticing invitations that paint the picture that you can have and be in a healthy relationship with money.

Be honest and do not cheat yourself that you can continually live beyond your means and expect to survive stay in safe territory by giving yourself a wide berth from the never ending clamor to consume more and more. That berth is what you need to finance the future you envisage with money, financial freedom.

Your relationship with money will shape the quality of your life more than you may realize. Like every meaningful relationship, it requires commitment, honesty, discipline, patience, gratitude, and intentional effort. Money is neither your enemy nor your savior , it simply reflects the habits and values you build around it. When treated wisely, it becomes a tool for freedom, security, growth, and peace of mind.

Take a moment today to examine your relationship with money. Are your habits building trust, stability, and freedom, or stress and frustration? Start small: write down your goals, track your spending, save intentionally, and invest consistently. The healthier your relationship with money becomes, the healthier your future will be.