A dead-simple guide for any Kenyan who’s tired of money just sitting in M-Shwari.

Picture this:
Ngong Road. Rain. Matatu smells like wet seats and ambition. I’m scrolling through my phone. I see my savings earn a sad 1%. Meanwhile, everyone on Twitter is suddenly an “NSE millionaire.”

One thought hit me hard: “If these people can buy shares, why am I still here acting broke?”

Fast-forward, and I’m now the proud owner of exactly KES 3,000 worth of Safaricom shares and the dumbest grin you’ve ever seen.
If you’re ready to stop watching from the sidelines, here’s everything I wish someone had told me before I started stressing about brokers.

First, Know Your Vibe

Are you:

• The “buy Safaricom/EABL and sleep for 10 years” type?
• The “let me try with 5K first” curious newbie?
• The future wolf of Upper Hill who’ll be trading daily?

Your answer decides which broker won’t waste your time (or your airtime) by calling them.

The 5 Things I Check Before I Give Anyone My Money

1. CMA License
If they’re not on the official CMA list → next caller. I’m not gambling with unregulated brokers.

2. Can I Open the CDS Account Without Crying?
Some brokers let you do everything on your phone in one afternoon. Others want you to print forms, find a commissioner of oaths, and sacrifice a goat. Pick the first one.

3. Fees That Don’t Make Me Shout “Aii!”
Real talk:

• Brokerage fees from different NSE brokers range between 1.3% and 2.1% (both buying and selling). For smaller trades (e.g., under KSh 100,000), many brokers charge on the higher end of their rate. It is usually the highest cost for most investors.
• Statutory fee: set by the Capital Markets Authority (CMA), the Nairobi Securities Exchange (NSE), and the Central Depository and Settlement Corporation (CDSC).
• Other charges may include VAT on fees, account opening & maintenance fees, withdrawal fees, inactivity fees, etc. These vary from broker to broker.

My advice is to ask for a full fee schedule before committing to a broker. If they dodge, dodge them.

4. An App That Actually Works
One of the biggest fears for beginners is using a platform that is confusing, unreliable, or inaccessible. Some of the things I looked for are

• Can I see live prices?
• Can I easily fund my account via M-Pesa or bank transfer?
• Can I track my shares and transaction history?
• Can I withdraw easily?

5. Customer Care That Treats Me Like a Human
If I reach out to them asking, “Why can’t I access my portfolio???” I want an answer, not “we are experiencing high call volume.”

How I Bought My First Shares (So You Can Copy-Paste)

• I opened a CDS account online (took 2 days).
• Sent KES 3,000 via M-Pesa while eating lunch.
• Stared at the app, refreshing like a madwoman.
• Order went through → instant small-girl-big-god energy.
• Closed the app and went back to work. Patience is part of the game.

Mistakes I Made So You Don’t Have To

• I trusted a broker just because my boys hyped them (spoiler: terrible support). Do your own research diligently before making a decision.
• I ignored custody fees – they ate half my tiny profit.
• I bought a random “hot stock” from Twitter and lost money in a week.
• I checked prices every 10 minutes and developed high blood pressure for nothing.

The Realest Thing I Can Tell You

You do not need KSh 50,000 to start.

I literally started with the money I was going to spend on Friday beers.
Today, that same KES 3,000 (plus a few top-ups and dividends) has grown enough to cover my Netflix subscription for a year. Small money, long time, big results.
So stop waiting for “the perfect moment.”
Open that account this week. Buy something boring and solid.
One day, you’ll check your portfolio after a long day and actually smile.
I believe in you.
Now go be about that stock market life.